Hotel Roethlisberger

This little bit of musical genius comes to us courtesy of The Football Girl.

I’m in awe/love.

Down a dark bathroom hallway.  Cheap grease in his hair.

Warm smell of Corona. Bring a stench in the air.

Up ahead in the distance she saw a fluorescent light.

Her head grew dizzy and her senses dulled.

She was his for the night.

Making out in the doorway. She heard her sisters yell.

And started thinking to herself. This could be heaven, but probably hell.

Then he lit up a camel. And he took her away.

The bodyguards shut and locked the door.

She could hear them say.

Welcome to the Hotel Roethlisberger.

Such a lovely face. Bring a can of mace.

Giving it up at the Hotel Roetlisberger.

What a bad surprise. You should close your eyes.

He’s got those Super Bowl rings, man. He’s got that Mercedes Benz.

He’s got a lot of moochers, hangers on, that calls friends.

How they inflate his ego.  Sweet sham acclaim.

Some prey for his money.

Some fake for his fame.

So he said to the girl.

Let’s go from behind, she said

It’s not my favorite way to go, but please no 69.

And still those towels are waving from far away.

Wake ‘em up in the middle of the night, just to hear them say.

Welcome to the Hotel Roethlisberger.

Such an ugly face, but he makes big plays.

Plenty of guests at the Hotel Roethlisberger.

She unzipped his fly.

That’s his alibi.

Next thing she remembers, she was running for the door.

Had to find that passage back to the girl she was before.

Relax, said the doorman, you are here to receive.

You can pass out any time you’d like

But you can never leave.


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